The other thing I've done to help my Christmas mood is to listen to Christmas music. I think I have 6 or so CDs worth of Christmas music on my computer, from Bing Crosby to Point Of Grace to New Song (I hate the Christmas Shoes song by the way… but I'll save that rant for another blog post!). One of New Song's, er, songs, is a grand rendition of Mr. Grinch. It's a recording that very obviously brought out the little boy in these grown men. Besides the exaggerated opera voices in parts and all around silliness, there's the line that says "you nauseate me, Mr. Grinch, with the nauseast of super naus!" and no joke, these guys have multiple belches recorded into the song - just in case you needed some help being nauseated, I guess! Still, even with the less-than-harmonious burping section, I really enjoy singing along with the rather heated indictment of the evil Mr. Grinch. And it made me thankful for Christ. Maybe I should explain a few thoughts in between those last two statements, eh?
I was thinking of how I enjoy the Grinch story, and it kind of hit me that even though he is called "mean" and he's supposed to be "evil" to some degree, he's not a real nasty bad guy. You know, you wouldn't put the Grinch in the same category as Hitler, or even Gaston from Beauty and the Beast. The Grinch isn't out to kill anyone - he's just mean. He's the guy who has just had a bad day or something, not the innately evil mind that plots to destroy the human race. The Grinch is, you know, kind of like… me. I'm not evil, I'm just mean sometimes. I just have those days that make me "want to kick baby ducks", to quote a friend who will remain anonymous. But I'm not the person who is evil to the core like the real bad guys.
Interesting, isn't it? We humans are so good at categorizing, and we even categorize our badness. I can agree with God that I'm a sinner in need of his grace… but I don't need it as badly as so-and-so. I'm a nice bad person, not a bad bad person.
Now, you probably know enough about me to know that my theology isn't quite so 'kranki', as they say in Tok Pisin. At least, the theology of truths that I carry in my head and spout with my mouth says that I'm just as bad a sinner as any dark character. But what about the theology of my heart, of my beliefs, which spills out into my actions whether I like it or not? I'm afraid that there, in the deepest corners of my being, I still struggle to believe in my own badness. But sometimes, even from something as innocent as listening to "Mr. Grinch", God reminds me that I am indeed evil and in desperate need of his wondrous salvation. For a moment I see myself as I am - helpless before a righteous God - and I cry out for his mercy. And then the moment is gone, as I look to Christ and know that I have nothing to fear.
Praise God for Christmas; praise God for the cross; and praise God for Mr. Grinch moments.
2 comments:
Katie, you've captured the situation of us all. Thanks for saying it so well. And remember, the Grinch was also redeemed in the end! And thanks for making your place in Ukarumpa Christmasy for yourself and for John and Tikvah. Love, Bob
Katie,
You've captured so well how we often think about ourselves, how we should think of ourselves, and the amazing truth of who we really are and who He is: "for a moment I see myself as I am - helpless before a righteous God-and I cry out for his mercy. And then the moment is gone, as I look to Christ and know that I have nothing to fear.
Love the picture.
I wish I had put some candles in the package coming to you.
Love,
Amy
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